As we leave the hottest July on record and move ever-closer to the cooler days of fall it is time to raise a glass to the celebrity girls of summer and their daring, darling and sometimes downright disastrous swimsuit choices. Here’s a parade of flesh for your enjoyment and derision as we take a peek at the best – and worst – swimwear of the season.
Usually seen in barely-there bikinis, Rihanna hits it out of the park in this fiery, floral one-piece. This suit offers coverage without looking stuffy or like it belongs on your grandma. Rihanna looks classic, timeless and gorgeous – and proves that you don’t have to expose all your assets to look dead sexy.
Of course her dancer’s bod looks smokin’ hot in just about anything, but this aqua bandeau suit stands out. The color is fantastic and is totally set off by her blonde locks and the brown embellishments. This is a modern twist on a classic style and Julianne wears it with ease, fun and panache.
The bootylicious fame whore has shown up in more than a couple scary, bondage-inspired suits this summer, but this sporty purple number makes the over-exposed reality star look fresh, young – and it emphasizes all the right curves.
This striped bikini with a retro flair is adorable, and who better to wear such a nostalgic style than country cutie Taylor Swift? Her red lipstick and tortoiseshell glasses make even her vampire-esque skin tone work.
I don’t know what’s driven Carrie to pull out her hair, but it’s definitely not her neon and black bikini. The slices of electric color turn what could be just another boring black suit into a memorable fashion statement.
Tik Tok, indeed. It looks like the granny clock has been ticking for party girl pop star Kesha. What was she thinking with this two-piece that gives her the figure of SpongeBob Squarepants? Maybe she should lay off the booze before going swimsuit shopping.
This starlet might have been able to kill Bill a little more quickly if she’d shown up in this frightening travesty of a bathing suit. He might have even fallen on his own sword rather than waiting around to see what might fall out of her ill-fitting top and attack him.
Even though Helen Mirren can get away with frolicking in a bikini, she is the exception to the rule. Bikinis belong to the young and nubile. Ivana, if your skin looks like you already spent too much time in the water before even dipping in your big toe; it’s time to upgrade to a tasteful one-piece suit.
LeAnn loves her teeny bikinis – but this one looks like it’s doing everything it can to escape her lithe frame. The bottoms seem to be rolling down and the top looks like an attempt to repurpose an old dust rag – come on, LeAnn, you can do better than this.